How Would You Move Mount Fuji

Because I haven't actually had to use my brain in over a year, I decided to pick up a couple of books to read this week instead of watching Law and Order 19 times. One of the books that I picked up is How Would You Move Mount Fuji, a book on how Microsoft and other companies use puzzles in their hiring process. Pretty good read so far.

Anyways, in the book they have a whole section of puzzles to work with so I thought it'd be interesting to throw around ideas and the such on how to solve them. Some of them are what they call impossible questions that may have four, ten or maybe one million correct answers. Some of them have a definite answer. I had already seen and worked out quite a few of these in the past, so if you've done that don't just blurt out the answer to look cool. Or use the internet to find the answer. Use your brain.  If you lack a brain, keep your damn mouth shut.

So the first puzzle (and probably the easiest): You have eight billard balls. One of them is "defective," meaning that it weighs more than the others. How do you tell, using a balance, which ball is defective in two weighings?

Posted by Phil on April 26th, in the middle of the night | 307 comments

Comments

Phil on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 4:30 AM

oh, if the answer is something like "sixteen monks," don't just say "sixteen monks." Write out how you figured it out...

adrian on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 6:07 AM

Wow, that is a mind boggling question at 9:00 a.m.

Bigworm on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 6:53 AM

This is how I would do it:

Place 4 balls on each side of the balance. Whichever side is heavier (indicated by the lower side of the balance) divide those balls in 1/2. Now you have 2 balls on each side of the scale. Once again, the side closest to the table or the ground contains the heaviest ball. You have done 2 weighings and have concluded that you have 2 balls left. In fact, the difference in the weight should be great enough so you can feel the difference in weight when holding the balls.

Marc on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 7:18 AM

wes loves to hole balls.
but i think i got this one.

HERE WE GO:
Measure 6 balls on the balance 3 on each side, IF the scale is balanced then you just need to balance the other two remaining balls to find the heavier. IF the scale is not balanced randomly take two of the balls of the 3 on the heavier side and weigh them against each other. IF they do not equally the heavier one will be shown by the scale being lower. IF they are equally the remaining ball of the heavier 3 from the previous weighing (that has not been on the balance for a second time) is the heaviest.

no looking up either. communications degree is good for something afterall.

Marc on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 7:21 AM

NOTE: in above comment "equally the" should read "equal, then" (both times) and "wes loves to hold balls", not "wes loves to hole balls".

i guess communications does suck afterall. or at least i do.

adrian on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 7:29 AM

Fag!

Phil on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 7:30 AM

ding, ding, ding. marc is the weiner. for some reason marc was able to use his communication degree to come up with the answer, and then word it in such a way to be totally confusing. but he's right about starting with three against three and going from there.

Phil on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 7:34 AM

this next one is harder.

you have five fars of pills. all the pills in one jar are "contaminated." The only way to tell which pills are contaminated is by weight. A regular pill weighs 10 grams; a contaminated pill is 9 grams. You are given a scale and allowed to make just one measurement with it. How do you tell which jar is contaminated.

So, if you take 5 pills from an uncontaminated jar and put them on the scale, it will read 50 grams. 5 pills from the contaminated jar weigh 45 grams.

adrian on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 7:34 AM

Hey phil, was that the only solution to the problem/question?

Phil on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 7:40 AM

that's the only way i can think of figuring it out. as for wes's answer, we'll assume that one is .0000001 lbs heavier, and we've got a kick ass scale that can figure that out.

Mindy on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 7:44 AM

so if you put one pill on at a time (without removing the previous pill) does it count as ONE measurement?

Phil on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 7:46 AM

nope, that would be multiple measurements.

Mindy on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 7:52 AM

what if you took bottle A and added only one pill from bottle B

then you take bottle C and add only one pill from bottle D

and balance those.

Then you have bottle E to the side.

If one of the bottles contains only one contaminated pill, it will be off by 1 gram, if a bottle is contaminated, it will be off by (# of pills x 1 gram.)

if they balance, then the contaminated bottle is bottle E.

Assuming this is a balancing scale.

Phil on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 7:52 AM

just to clear things up, let's say the scale has a button that displays the current weight. you allowed to press the button once.

Phil on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 7:54 AM

oooh, mindy would have it...if we had a balance. good job sweet pea.

but we have a scale.

adrian on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 8:00 AM

Marc, you getting lunch today? I didn't bring my phone so just tell me

Mindy on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 8:00 AM

Alrighty then.

Take one pill from Bottle A,

two pills from Bottle B,

Three pills from Bottle C,

four pills from BOttle D,

and five pills from Bottle E.

push said button.

If it is off by one gram, its Bottle A, 2 grams, its Bottle B...and so on.

stupid button.

Marc on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 8:08 AM

adrian, yeah. i can get lunch today. awesome job mindy

Bigworm on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 8:08 AM

Good job mindy.

Phil on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 8:08 AM

ding, ding, ding. mindy got it!!!!

the other good answer would be to do the same thing mindy said, but with only four bottles. 1+2+3+4. If it equals 100, you know it's the other bottle. If it equals 99, you know it's bottle #1, 98 bottle #2, etc.

And now for a more abstract question: why are manhole covers round? I thought of a couple of reasons myself...

mowgli on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 8:18 AM

Couldn't you put all 5 pill bottles on the scale at once.(assuming all the bottles, including the contaminated, contain equal amounts of pills in them) Being one measurement, get the total wt.

Then, take off 1 bottle at a time, subracting the wt for each bottle removed, therefore you would have the weight of each bottle, again assuming they all have equal amounts of pills in them. We can then assume that the conaminated bottle of pills would be lesser numbered wt.

Also, technically it is a one time measurement putting them all on scale at once, it did't say how we should take them off the scale...

Mindy on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 8:19 AM

shank-shu.- now its off to my statistics class, for me.

mowgli on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 8:23 AM

circles can withstand more pressure than squares, so wt applied on a circle (manhole) can take more pressure than a square manhole, due the equallity of the wt distributed.

Mindy on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 8:24 AM

SO they won't fall in!

Brock on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 8:32 AM

Do you know how heavy a manhole cover is?!
It has to be round to roll it out of the way when you pry it up with a bar.
Oh... and pipes are round.

And I like to crawl around in sewers.

Phil on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 8:37 AM

I think we got all five answers that come up. Mindy has the most common one. You could turn a square manhole cover and drop it into the sewer. Brock also has good points about popping it up. If it is round, you can roll it and you also don't have to worry about rotating it when you place it.

One of the more flippant answers was also given by brock. Why are manhole covers round? Because manholes are round.
Lynnie is also right, there is a reason shields were made round.

That question was so common at Microsoft during interviews that people would show up and the first thing out of their mouths would be "so it doesn't fall in!"

Phil on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 8:39 AM

More fun, and even more abstract: how many gas stations are in the US. Assume that 300 million people live in the US. Write out your logic.

Phil on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 8:43 AM

Btw, New York City has square manhole covers: http://www.forgotten-ny.com/STREET%...es/manhole.html

Marc on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 9:10 AM

should the gas stations be based on a number of gas stations per person? like some cities have to hire a ploice officer for ever 300 people in there area. (some have different numbers) also in America there is a chicken for every person in america. to keep eggs in abundance. (keep those chickens away from Brock) just like we have a shortage of dairy cows now, which is why milk price will be going up $.50. milk prices will beat gas prices. gas averages now $1.80(while hitting someplaces at $2.20 per gallon. Milk will be a $3.00 per gallon average. this are just ratio to per thoughts on other goods, not gas and gas stations. so i will now shutup, think about this. and blow my brains out. not really.

Brock on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 9:10 AM

I would assume a ratio of about 1 gas station for every 2 people. This assumes that every other person in the U.S. drives.

adrian on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 9:23 AM

so you are saying there are about 125 million gas stations Brock? If that was the case, then there are approximately 2.5 million gas stations in each state. That seems a little high in my opinion.

I think there are exactly 5,000,000 gas stations in the United States. My logic is...4,999,999 is to few....5,000,001 is to many!

Phil on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 9:29 AM

marc is on the right track with trying to figure out how many gas stations are need for how many people... i'd say a safe assumption is that for every two people, you have one car. so maybe 150 million cars...

KellyHarrison on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 10:08 AM

this is like math, i hate math! no good at it! this is for all you smart people! good luck! phil, ever look up the egg velocity thing? i looked it up and all i could find was something on people hating mini vans.

Bigworm on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 10:11 AM

the only problem with that Lynnie is you are assuming the bottles weigh exaclty the same.....which is not stated in the question....and I see everyday how the same vial/bottle..etc....doesn't weigh the same.

Phil on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 10:29 AM

plus lynnie would be making multiple measurements technically.

Brock on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 10:39 AM

I thought the rule was if you didn't have a brain you couldn't comment on this post, eh-hum.

Yeah, I was just thinking out loud there, thanks for pointing out the dumbass logic Adrian. But, if you have 150,000,000 cars, I'd say divide that by 1000 b/c of mileage, and that would give you about 150,000 stations, which is lot more logical.

Bigworm on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 10:41 AM

Gas Stations:

Definately have to approach this problem with a per person ratio. I think you would have a gas station per every 4000 people or 2000 cars. So I'd say approximately 75,000 gas stations.

Phil on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 10:50 AM

brock is actually pretty damn close. the book says 187,000. but from an interview standpoint, a hard ass would probably say wes had a better answer because of his logic.

the way i broke it down was figuring that of the 150 million cars, people probably need to be refuelded once a week. a single pump can hand maybe 10 cars an hour. i'd say that on average, maybe 10 people per station per hour. figuring that a service station is open maybe 100 hours a week on average, you start looking at about 1000 customers per week, which would take 150,000 gas stations to service.

That type of question is very popular. Another variant is how many piano tuners are there in the world, which the interviewer wants to see how you break down a problem.

Phil on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 10:56 AM

another question, why are beers cans tapers at the top and the bottom?

Phil on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 10:57 AM

by tapers, i mean tapered. i'm retarded.

Jay on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 11:11 AM

This is probably wrong, because I suck at these things, but it would save on material vs. just perfect cylinders, but then that's not right because you could just make the cans smaller. Maybe to make them stack better? I don't know, I'm stupid.

adrian on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 11:13 AM

Xota, you coming up to trivia tonight?

Jay on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 11:22 AM

Probably.

Phil on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 11:25 AM

big jay is pretty damn close on saving on material. they use more expensive aluminum on the top so it can handle popping the lid off. and then to make them stack they need to make the bottom smaller

Jay on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 11:43 AM

Oh my god! I wasn't totally wrong. How about them apples.

Jay on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 11:43 AM

Oh my god! I wasn't totally wrong. How about them apples.

Jay on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 12:00 PM

Oh my god! I wasn't totally wrong. How about them apples.

Jay on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 12:01 PM

Whoops!!! Didn't mean to do that. My bad.

Bigworm on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 12:06 PM

I might even make it to trivia tonight. if I get out of here at a decent time.

Phil on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 12:15 PM

ok, here's one: how many points are there on the globe where, by walking one mile south, one mile east and one mile north, you reach the place where you started?

Marc on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 12:53 PM

i want to say one. (north polar icecap AKA North Pole) if that counts as a walkable landmass. but i figure i'm probably wrong for underthinking it.

Phil on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 12:55 PM

marc's right, he was underthinking it. the northpole is one place you can do it, but there are other starting spots...

Bigworm on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 1:11 PM

You can do it at the North Pole, I will argue you should be able to do it at indefinate spots from the North Pole (choosing indefinite "spots" around the north pole).



Bigworm on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 1:14 PM

indefinite = infinite in previous post.

Cannot do the southpole because you can not walk south at the southpole.

KellyHarrison on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 1:22 PM

i know i'm wrong, but wouldn't it be four points since it is north, east, south and west?

Tom Jones on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 1:36 PM

Yall have to much free time on your hands-go to a bar and drink. Then once you are blind drunk, just guess on every equation and worse case scenario-you od on the pills question

Tom Jones on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 1:38 PM

By the way is that book written by the guy who did Die Hard 3? Wouldn't we need Sam Jackson or Bruce Willis to figure these out?

Marc on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 2:02 PM

the Die Hard with a Vengence riddle was to use a 3-gallon and 5-gallon jug to get exactly 4 gallons into one of the jugs. no more, no less ......or .....kaboom.

Marc on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 2:15 PM

I could let you all figure that one for yourself. but I won't because I'm evil.

You fill up th 3-gallon jug all the way then pour that into the 5-gallon jug. you do this again but the 5-gallon will be full when you still have water in the 3-gallon jug. if you didn't spill any water you will have 1 gallon in the 3-gallon jug. Pour out the water in the 5-gallon jug, and pour in the water left in the 3-gallon jug. Then fill up the 3-gallon jug once more, and pour the water in the 3-gallon jug into the 5-gallon jug, giving you exactly 4 gallons of water in the 5-gallon jug. Hence no kaboom.

By the way don't leave that bomb there.....a kid could find it.

Mindy on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 2:24 PM

First off, I would like to say that there must be a very large globe out there somewhere, if I can walk a mile on it.

I am trying to figure out how to word this.

In my head it would work wherever walking a mile East actually puts you back to where you stopped going South. Therefore when you walk North you are just retracing your exact steps.

What about the lattitude line that is i mile above where the Earth is 1 mile in circumference? (Right Above the South Pole.)

I think you could start from any point on that line.





Mindy on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 2:27 PM

I meant to say "...the latitude line that is ONE mile above..." not i mile above

Jay on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 2:30 PM

If you had a fox, a chicken, and a bag of feed to get across the river with canoe that can only hold you and one of the objects, how would you get them across if the fox would eat the hen if they were left alone and the hen would eat the feed if left alone? (It makes sense to me. Do you guys understand what i'm asking.)

Mindy on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 2:33 PM

SPeaking of trying to word that one correctly...

uhh..
This would also work 1 mile above:
any latitude line whose circumference can evenly be divided into one.

For example:if the circumference is 1/2 a mile, two complete rotations would put you back to the p[oint where you stopped traveling South.

Mindy on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 2:44 PM

SO there would be an infinite number of points on each latitude, and an infinite number of latitudes,

Plus the north pole- which would only be one starting point-not an infinite amount of starting points.

Although your first step could be an infinite number of points.

Marc on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 2:54 PM

I think Mindy is on the right track.


Side Note: New Spiderman trailer looks cool.
http://www.apple.com/trailers/sony_...-man_2/trailer/

KellyHarrison on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 5:04 PM

ok, just a guess
the hen would eat the feed, the fox would eat the hen, then you could take them all across in the canoe? kinda a gross guess, but hey, we already know i don't have a brain!
Mindy, you see the preview for shrek 2? isn't it cute!
my top five guys:
The Rock
Vin Diesel
Fred Savage
Sean Connery
the guy that plays grisom on CSI las vegas
Marc, what is his name again? i know it's William something?
what are your all's top five girl or guy actor/actresses?

Bigworm on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 8:35 PM

Yes she is on the right track.

KellyHarrison on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 8:48 PM

marc, the computer wouldn't let me watch the trailer without a certain program! i might get a job at kinko's making more money and more hours! yes!

Bigworm on Monday, April 26, 2004 at 8:53 PM

Jay here is my answer:
1. Grab the hen and drop her off on side #2
2. Row back to side #1 and grab the feed.
3. Row back to side #2 and trade the Feed for the hen.
4. row back to side #1 and replace the hen with the fox.
5. Row back to side #2 and drop off the fox.
6. Row back to side #1, grab the hen, go back to side #2.

You should be across with the hen, feed, and fox intact.

Phil on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 4:36 AM

Mindy was right about the north pole and the south pole. The traditional answer was one (the north pole), but some smart ass figured out it was possible at any spot 1 mile + 1/2p miles north of the south pole. And also at 1 + 1/4p. And 1 + 1/8p miles on to infinity.

So the "correct" answer is 1+8+8 spots

Phil on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 4:41 AM

Hmmmm, the little symbols didn't show up in my post. The lower case p after 1/4 should be pi, and the 1+8+8 should be 1+infinity+infinity. opps.

I think wes got the hen one. Here's another one: You have a length of fuse that will burn for exactly one hour. But the fuse does not burn at a constant rate. There are fast-burning sections and slow burning sections. How do you measure 30 minutes using only the fuse and a lighter. Bonus question: You have two of these fuses, how would you measure 45 minutes?

Bigworm on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 5:51 AM

If you light both end of the fuse simultaneously, you will burn the fuse in exaclty 1/2 hour. I will answer the bonus question when I have more time.

Bigworm on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 6:06 AM

Bonus question answer:

Using my first method light the 2 ends of fuse 1 and one end of fuse 2 simulaneously. This will burn in 30 minutes.

After fuse 1 is finished burning, light the other end of fuse 2. 30 minutes remaining for fuse 2 gets cut in half by lighting the other end of the fuse so the remaining 1/2 of fuse 2 will burn in 15 minutes.

30 min. + 15 min. = 45 minutes

Phil on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 6:17 AM

wes is the smarty pants. similiar to jay's question (i thought this was pretty damn tough to figure out):

four people must cross a rickety footbridge at night. Many planks are missing, and the bridge can hold only two people at a time (any more than two, and the bridge colapses). The travelers must use a flashlight to guide their steps; otherwise they're sure to step through a missing space and fall to their death. There is only one flashlight. The four people each travel at different speeds. Adam can cross the bridge in one minute; Larry in two minutes; Edge takes five minutes; and the slowest person, Bono, needs ten minutes. The bridge is going to collapse in exactly seventeen minutes. How can all four people cross the bridge?

Brock on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 7:41 AM

Owww... reading that question hurt my brain on its own!

Bigworm on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 8:03 AM

can we allow for a radius of the flashlight or do they 2 crossers have to have it in their position together?

Phil on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 8:13 AM

the two crossers must go with each other. two at a time (or one a time, actually)

Brock on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 8:15 AM

I say someone needs to lay off the fuckin' twinkies (Bono!)! I can do it in 19 minutes, but unless Larry bails, we're fucked. But if it was me, I'd leave Bono. He's a sonofabitch for being too slow. Natural selection baby!

mowgli on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 8:16 AM

have adam carry bono as bono holds the flashlight (1 minute across). drop off bono, and adam comes back with the flashlight(1 minute back). TOTAL= 2 minutes.

then have adam, again, carry edge across while edge holds light (1 minute across) and come back with the flashlight (1 minute back). TOTAL= 2 minutes

adam and the remaining larry can cross with 3 minutes left, plenty of time left for both there speeds.

TOTAL= 7 minutes

Phil on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 8:18 AM

bono weighs 900lbs. that's why it takes him that long to cross. adam can't carry him.

Brock on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 8:21 AM

But what if Adam has herculean strength! He could just heave that fat ass Bono across.

mowgli on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 8:21 AM

I guess bono is fucked then! and his 900lbs fat ass should die!

mowgli on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 8:25 AM

would shoving the flashlight up bono's ass make him go any faster perhaps...

Phil on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 8:30 AM

NattySci: where thinking "outside the box" always results in something shoved up an ass.

btw, the rumor with question is that 50 software developers spent their lunch trying to figure it out, and couldn't. it is pretty damn tough.

although wes's answer to the fox and the hen question yesterday is very similiar to this one...

Green Baron on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 8:31 AM

What if they do the Indiana Jones' thing and just cut it loose when Bono's fat ass is on the bridge.....thereby speeding his passage....I'd say knock it down to 10 secs. max.

mowgli on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 8:36 AM

I agree with Indiana Jones scenario!

Phil on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 8:36 AM

i think you are just agreeing with the balls in your mouth scenario.

Phil on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 8:36 AM

oh, i bumped up the font size. just hit ctrl-f5 and everything is bigger.

Brock on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 8:47 AM

Ok, to prove that if you have enough Ph.D.'s in one place, you can get things done.

Larry and Adam cross together: 2 min
Adam goes back: 1 min
Bono (fat piece of shit) and Edge cross: 10 min
LARRY (the speed demon) goes back for his lover Adam: 2 min
Adam and Larry (holding hands) trot back across: 2 min
Total time: 17 min and they live long lives producing crappy songs for the next 10 years and having wild monkey love.

Bigworm on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 8:47 AM

yeah it's a similar question and I am close.....just no cigar yet....BTW no fat lady is sining either.

Marc on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 8:49 AM

what it Fatty (bono) ate Edge as a sanck while Adam took larry across the bridge and back? Fatty could do it.

mowgli on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 8:51 AM

ok, adam and larry cross (2 minutes across), adam comes back with flashlight (1 minute back). TOTAL= 3 minutes

fat ass and edge cross (10 minutes across), larry comes with flashlight (2 minutes back). TOTAL= 12 minutes

then, larry and adam come back with flashlight in hand (2 miznits across). TOTAL= 2 minutes

GRAND TIZOTAL= 17 MIZNITS

Phil on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 8:55 AM

hey, brock and lynnie got it.

mowgli on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 8:55 AM

damn you brock!!! thought I had it until I refreshed the page.

Brock on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 8:56 AM

I would like to request another question that involves people such as this last one. I like the interesting stories that arise from their mis-adventures.

Marc on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 9:00 AM

good job guys. however. i was about to suggest they skip the bridge and all ride fatty over like a raft in the damn water below the bridge(assuming there is water below the bridge.

adrian on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 9:00 AM

marc, you getting lunch today?

Bigworm on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 9:00 AM

Ah you fuckers....almost got it.

Phil on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 9:01 AM

how about one that involves goblins? everyone loves goblins?

you are in a boat in the exact center of a perfectly circular lake. There is a goblin on the shore of the lake. The goblin wants to do bad things to you. The goblin can't swim and doesn't have a boat. Provided you can makie to the shore -- and the goblin isn't there, waiting to make you his person fuck toy -- you can always outrun him on land and get away.

The problem is this. The goblin can run four times as fast as the maximum speed of your boat (which is faster than you can swim). He has perfect eyesight, never sleeps, never gets tired and is extremely logical (ie, you can't fake him out). He will do everything in his power to catch you. How would you escape the goblin?

Marc on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 9:08 AM

sure, adrian i can grab lunch today

Marc on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 9:16 AM

what about something like this. (note: only been thinking for less than a minute.)
you ride along with but under the boat to shore and then turn the somamabitch around and let it go the other way (assuming it's motorized, because it is faster than swimming. then the goblin, although traveling four times faster than the boat, has to travel around the edge of the lake, while you get out and run on your side of the lake.

Green Baron on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 9:27 AM

Here you go.....
Why don't you start making for the shore opposite the goblin....
As soon as he picks his direction to run, constantly adjust your direction so you are always heading towards the shore opposite of him. You should be able to curve your path to give you enough time to outrun the goblin.
I'm sure there's math to the real answer, but I haven't had my heroin shot yet.
By the way.....is there astroglide in the boat? Perhaps a goblin's fuck-buddy isn't all that bad?

Phil on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 9:36 AM

Marc, to go from one shore to the other would be 2*r feet. The time for the goblin would be 2*r*pi feet. The goblin can go 4 times faster than the boat (4 is greater than pi), so it would easily beat you.

As for jetting back and forth, the same thing applies. The goblin will be able to keep up with you as you go back and forth.

Bigworm on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 9:38 AM

I don't think that will work Ballz_n_ur_mouth. The reason being because even though ou will be able to drive the Diameter of the circle, D = 2r, where he runs the circumference of C = Pi*D or 2*Pi*r. This looks good until you start plugging in numbers for D or r, respectively and you realize that you are ahead. However, when you divide his distance to run by 4, you should notice that Pi is less than 4 so in reality he is beating you to the spot.

Bigworm on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 9:42 AM

Keeping in mind that we are in a circle, I suggest that you drive around the outside of the cicle, though not close enough so the goblin can jump on the boat. By doing so, I think we can use the centripetal force from the boat to our advantage and be able to actually defeat the evil goblin.

Tom Jones on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 9:44 AM

I'll tell you a slam dunk was winning the Trivia game last night.

Phil on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 9:46 AM

wes is pretty close. not about the centripetal force thing though.

mowgli on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 10:33 AM

by taking Wes's idea of circling the lake, the guy in the boat would have to circle at certain distance from edge of the lake and the center, in which he would be faster than the molesting orc circling on the outside (near the edge he would be to slow, the goblin being 4x faster), once the guy finds a spot that is faster, he then would need enough time to row ashore once the goblin was farthest from him (complete opposite of him), but then the goblin may reach him once he gets to shore...I don't know, this one sucks and is hurting my brain. damn physics.

Green Baron on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 10:43 AM

This is a common and easy one.......
You're testing a race car. If you average 30 mph over the first mile, how fast will you have to average the second mile so that the total average speed over the entire 2 miles will be 60 mph?

I like speed.....

Mindy on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 10:49 AM

How clear is this said lake?

Mindy on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 10:52 AM

For the record: I figured out the ricketty bridge one, an hour before Brock posted... but I had no access to a computer.

and I am finished being a brat now.

Brock on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 11:05 AM

If you had no access to a computer, how could have access to the question?

Dween on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 11:09 AM

Answer to the racecar problem:

To average 60 miles an hour, you must travel 1 mile in 1 minute, or 2 miles in 2 minutes.
If you average 30 miles an hour, it takes 2 minutes to travel 1 mile.
So to average 60 miles per hour, you must finish the 2nd mile in 0 time, which is impossible.

Phil on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 11:12 AM

lynnie is dead on with the molesting goblin. since the monster can go 4 times the speed of the boat, you need to start covering a distance in a circle that allows you to go in a circle slightly faster than 4 times his speed (which is pi*r). So if we go in a path just under the radio / 4 until the monster is on the opposite side of us (no way the monster can keep up mind you), and we take off we'll be 5/4 * r distance from the shore, which will allow you to escape.

Dween on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 11:16 AM

PIE PROBLEM:
If a man and a half can eat a pie and a half in a minute and a half, how long will it take 30 men to eat 60 pies?

RIDDLE:
The man who makes it doesn't want it.
The man who buys it doesn't need it.
The man who uses it doesn't know it.
What is it?

Bigworm on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 11:19 AM

Fuckers.

Marc on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 11:19 AM

Lake answer.
It's real simple now that I see it clearly. It's all about angular speed. if the guy in the boat in the center of the lake travels in many spiraling-out circles then he will be constantly gaining on the molesting goblin because his ever-changing circumferences will be less in length and quicker to travel than the goblin's full circumference of the lake. With enough spiraling, eventually the guy in the boat will be able to reach the edge of the lake with a lead and safe distance away from the goblin.

P.S. actually Adrian explained this to me at lunch, cleverly using two different-sized Arby's drink lids. It was a cool and cheap visual aid.

Bigworm on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 11:20 AM

A coffin.

Phil on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 11:30 AM

assuming that if 1.5 men can eat 1.5 pies in 90 seconds, you could assume that 3 men could eat 3 pies in 90 seconds too. so 30 men could eat 30 pies in 90s, add another 30 pies they'll knock it out in about three minutes.

Marc on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 11:32 AM

Riddle:
Madonna doesn't have one
Some are longer than others
The Pope doesn't use his.

Phil on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 11:41 AM

you wouldn't be talking about THE Madonna Ciccone, would you marc?

Mindy on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 11:45 AM

Read question at home.
went to class.
came back to computer.


ya little hardwick.




Marc on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 11:46 AM

The answer isn't sexually based

Bigworm on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 11:50 AM

And for the record......I knew what I was fucking talking about with the Goblin problem....I am just an idiot and blurted out cent. force instead of angular speed.....so yes, I am the big LOSER for the day.

Also for the record, Abby and I are having a Derby party at our house, so of course you guys are invited. The wife and I will be providing food, however, as nice as we are at times we won't be providing all the booze, cause damn that shit is expensive. So I am buying a bottle of Jager, I know Adrian is bringing redbull. All that I ask, is if you decide to come to bring some beer or alcohol to share. the more the merrier and of course the tap machine will be there too. Let me know if you need directions.

Phil on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 11:51 AM

i know the answer isn't sexually based. but I do think I shot a hole in the riddle.

was I right about the pies, James?

Bigworm on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 11:53 AM

How about last name's Marc.

Bigworm on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 11:54 AM

I am an idiot.....it is the theme for the day today.

How about a last name Marc.

Dween on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 12:20 PM

You're right about the pies, Phil.
And yes Bigworm, it's a coffin.

This may not have a definite answer, but see what you can come up with:

Find the longest word you can type on a QWERTY keyboard, such that each key used in the word is touching another (i.e. the letter "D" touches E,S,X,C,F, and R), without using a letter twice. The touching letters do not have to be consecutive, but must form a touching chain of letters.

Hope that makes sense.

Phil on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 12:27 PM

soo...would treads count? i doubt it's the longest, but would it count?

Marc on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 12:31 PM

wes is right, last name is correct.

Phil on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 12:32 PM

Would ThuglifeDork count?

Marc on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 12:48 PM

is derth the longest?
http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=derth

Dween on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 12:55 PM

Derth doesn't work. The T and H don't touch.
And if Thuglifedork were a real word, yes it would.
Treads counts. So, the best real word we've found has 6 letters in it.
I found a word that has 9 letters.

Mindy on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 12:59 PM

Phil, why the sudden slacking?

I need a question to help me in my procrastination of studying for finals.

Marc on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 12:59 PM

treads doesn't count. treds counts.

Mindy on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 1:00 PM

treads does count.

Dween on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 1:02 PM

It doesn't matter if the letters are in order or not on the keyboard. Or as I said before, they don't have to be consecutive. Since the "A" touches the "S", it's fine.

Marc on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 1:02 PM

no no no, T touches R which touches E which doesn't touch A, but does touch D, which touchs S

Brock on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 1:02 PM

This is like the game Boggle.

Marc on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 1:03 PM

ah well shit, then that makes it a lot easier

Dween on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 1:21 PM

Actually, it's NOT like Boggle, because in Boggle, each letter you use must touch the previous letter in your word. In the puzzle I posed, that is NOT the case. Just so long as each letter you use EVENTUALLY touches others in the chain.

A touches S, which touches D and E, which touches R, which touches T. A-S-D-E-R-T mixes up into TREADS.

Dween on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 1:22 PM

Phil, Why is the message board posting Pacific time zone times? It's 4:22pm, not 1:22pm.

Phil on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 1:29 PM

because the webhost is in cali, and i don't feel like adding threae hours in every spot times are being used. the moral of the story, as usual, is that I'm lazy.

Dween on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 4:29 PM

Forward I'm heavy.
Backward I'm not.
What am I?

KellyHarrison on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 4:46 PM

are you an animal or an object?

mowgli on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 5:40 PM

your a ton!

Bigworm on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 5:59 PM

Boggle Words:

G-T-R-E-S-A = GREATS OR GRATES

Bigworm on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 6:03 PM

7 letter word

A-S-D-E-R-T-F = STRAFED

stew on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 6:11 PM

Ah! Riddles! My frostbitten Canadian brain doesn't seem able
to deciphere them.
Anyways, I was wondering if anyone had any plans for Derby...

mowgli on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 9:05 PM

just to get things straight fellas, Spiderman 2 comes out june 30th, on a friday, but not this friday...who would think this month was june...me...nooooo!!! Must be the constant exposure to the Dihydrogen Monoxide, I wish there was a way to detect that harmful shit...

KellyHarrison on Tuesday, April 27, 2004 at 9:44 PM

stew, what's up?
hey guys, what sound does a rooster make when it crows? just a random thought, i'm bored!
what does s-u-o-i-h-s-o-d-i-l-a-i-p-x-e-c-i-t-s-i-l-i-g-a-r-f-i-l-a-c-r-e-p-u-s spell? yes, it really is a word.

Dween on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 4:23 AM

FYI, the 9-letter word I found was DAUGHTERS.

Phil on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 4:49 AM

this is an easy one, and I probably should have done it first. You have four cards on a table:
A F 2 7

The puzzle is this: "Identify which card(s) you need to turn over in order to test the rule 'if there is a vowel on one side of the card, there is an even number on the other side'"

Bigworm on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 5:46 AM

1. A
2. 2

You shouldn't turn over the F or the 7 because there is no information about what is on the other side if anything.

Mindy on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 6:51 AM

Kell(ie)y (???)....... YOu wrote Mary poppins saying backwards.
I don't think that it qualifies as a word.
Because you spelled it backwards.

Plus.. if it was spelled correctly, I am sure we could all take out the dashes, to "discover" the answer.

Mindy on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 6:52 AM

Yes- I am a little stressed this week!

Mindy on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 6:57 AM

Oh wait...yeah its spelled incorrectly, too.

It's actually spelled:
supercalifragilisticexpialido"cious"

Only backwards.

So no,no it is not a word. Even Backwards

And I am off to take a final.

Phil on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 7:11 AM

mindy, i think kellie was seing if we knew what word had all those letters in it. and supercalifragilisticexpialidocious isn't a word.

adrian on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 7:20 AM

I am so fucking bored right now I am acutally looking up .Net

Phil on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 7:28 AM

no one disputing wes' answer?

Green Baron on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 7:36 AM

I asked the question, yesterday:
You're testing a race car. If you average 30 mph over the first mile, how fast will you have to average the second mile so that the total average speed over the entire 2 miles will be 60 mph

Nobody got it right.....
The question to ask was.....what kind of car? Because you're testing a modified Delorean......one with a flux capacitor. In order to average 60 mph, you would need to go 88 mph the second mile, and set the time circuits to 1 min in the past, and then finish the second mile averaging 60 mph. Geez......I thought that was an easy one people....
How about this one....
Three men enter a hotel and ask for a room (they're from California). The hotel keeper says it's $30. They each pay $10. They all climb into their room and go to bed. A few hours later, the hotel keeper realizes he overcharged them....the room was only $25. So he calls the bell boy and sends him upstairs with 5 $1 bills to repay the men. The bell boy, on his way up, realizes there are three men, but $5......so he pockets 2 of the dollars, and gives the men back $3.
So.....to sum up......
each man paid $9 = $27
bell boy kept $2
That's only $29..........yet there was $30 to start....
Where's the missing dollar?

Phil on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 7:50 AM

err, each men didn't pay 9 bucks each, right? there is still 25 bucks in the till, which puts each person as spending 8.33, and then getting a dollar back.

Green Baron on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 7:55 AM

Nope...
The three men got $3 back
so $1 each.
Since each had paid 10, and got 1 back, that's $9
9 X 3 = 27
bell boy kept 2
27 + 2 = 29.......1 dollar is missing....where is it?

astroglide rules....

joe on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 7:58 AM

i hate that fucking hotel problem you cocksucker ballz_n_ur_mouth..it simply violates one of those distributive or commutative associative gay rules...fucking math shit

Phil on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 8:00 AM

the men spent $27 dollars for a $25 dollar a room. You need to subtract, not add the bellboys money to get your total.

3 * 10 = 30
So subtact five from each side
3 * 10 -5 = 25
each guy get a buck, bell boy gets two
each guy gets a buck, and the bell boy takes two
3 * 9 - bellboy's money = 25

or maybe in bizzaro bad math land, two guys come in the next day and also spend 30 bucks. the inn keeper dude realizes he screws up again, and gives the bell boy five bucks to send up to the two guys. this time the bell boy take three bucks. 14 * 2 + 3 = 31 dollars. there's your extra dollar.

Green Baron on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 8:03 AM

Way to go phil,
It's obvious you're a big fan of astrolide too!

Phil on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 8:03 AM

opps, deleted a line:
3 * 10 = 30
So subtact five from each side
3 * 10 -5 = 25
each guy get a buck, bell boy gets two
3 * 10 - 3 - 2 = 25
3 * (10 - 1) - 2 = 25
each guy gets a buck, and the bell boy takes two
3 * 9 - bellboy's money = 25

KellyHarrison on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 8:35 AM

it's a word in a movie! not a real one, but they use it, hell! (smiles) using this since chris doesn't like aol or anything else that uses smily faces and what not.

adrian on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 8:45 AM

I haven't done shit all day. I have been looking at guitars and asp.net all day. Marc, lets go to Long John Silvers today

Marc on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 8:55 AM

it's a fake word, real movie. hope using that world doesn't get more people to the site. that should be reserved for beastiality, paris hilton video, and spelling Ralph Macchio's name incorrectly.

Adrian, no fish. fish is bad. but it you want to go to that expensive KFC/A&W or somewhere else, I'm game.

KellyHarrison on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 8:56 AM

adrian, good luck on that one. marc hates seafood and mexican. i think the only seafood he will eat sometimes is shrimp.
oh joe, i agree, that fucking math shit is gay, gay, gay. marc, what movie is that gay, gay, gay line from? the main guy that was on h2o is in it. his name is josh something or other. i know it starts with an H, but not even attempting to spell it because i will get it wrong.

Phil on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 9:04 AM

so i guess marc won't be going down on any hot mexican chicks, huh?

Marc on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 9:10 AM

supercalifragilisticexpialidocious is used in Mary Poppins

Josh Hartnett was in H20: Halloween 20 Years Later

Mexican Food is stupid anyway. All it consists of is variations of tortilla, meat, cheese, lettuce, and other vegatables.

Marc on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 9:12 AM

actually, i've been saying that for awhile as a joke, phil. but Roselyn Sanchez is hot
http://imdb.com/name/nm0761052/

adrian on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 9:12 AM

I was just messing with marc. I know that goofey bastard doesn't like Long John Silvers. I guess we can go to KFC...AGAIN!

KellyHarrison on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 9:12 AM

http://img54.photobucket.com/albums...ove/roses-2.gif (picture i won first place on)
Phil, i think those would be an exception. he'd probably go down on the chick from charlies angels...(the only one that wasn't white) forget her name...

Phil on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 9:18 AM

i got a hankering for one of the those crunchy cheesy gordita crunch taco like thingies. mmmmm, good.

but instead I'll let my work by me baby back ribs and shrimp. Again.

Marc on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 9:25 AM

Actually kellie. Lucy Lui is of chinese-descent. But i like to eat chinese already. I like chinese food too.

Brock on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 9:37 AM

Marc, you can burn! Long John Silvers is the best "fast" food you can get! Adrian has inspired me to get some soon! Too bad Michelle won't let me eat it 5 days a week, or I would. Besides, they don't just have fish. They've got those new buffalo chicken planks... pretty good actually. But I liked the regular planks a lot anyway.

The moral of the story: Marc is a picky little bitch you is all sissy about his food. "I won't eat this, I won't eat that, I like having a big vagina!"

Brock on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 9:46 AM

While I'm thinking about it... does anyone have plans for memorial day weekend?
Group camping trip? We can set someone on fire, drink beer, hunt deer with our bare hands, drink tequilla, use Jay to ram trees, drink Jager, watch Phil piss in the fire, drink car-bombs, cringe at Adrian hitting on the 10 year olds, drink Booker's, watch Lynnie dress up like an actor from Braveheart and declare war on the squirrels, drink whiskey, watch Wes eat moths, drink Maker's, and run frantically through the woods running from Burket when he snaps and starts a killing spree.

Sounds fun!

Marc on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 9:47 AM

besides the typo of "you" for "who" in the last part, you pretty much hit it on the head with a dead-on-balls accurate immitation of me. good job.

Phil on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 10:09 AM

man, i'm still getting over the fact that kellie that lucy liu was mexican. comedy genius.

Phil on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 10:12 AM

this auction on eBay is pretty damn funny: http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dl...&category=6%

Brock on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 10:32 AM

Pretty damn funny? That is side-splitting! God bless capitalism where a poor sap who got hosed by an ex can make $15,000 on her old dress, and stick it to her like the piece of shit she is!

Tom Jones on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 10:56 AM

That was funny as shit

Phil on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 10:59 AM

the funniest thing was clearly: "Oh, yeah. I also got three marriage proposals. Yes, you read it right - three marriage proposals. I feel like one of those mass murderers on death row. I never understood how the hell they got more chicks than I did. Now I know. They sold crap on eBay."

Tom Jones on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 11:01 AM

Kelly how could you think Lucy Lu is Mexican??

Dween on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 11:21 AM

I think it has to do with this Taco Bell promo shot starring Lucy Liu:

http://tinyurl.com/2kylp

adrian on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 11:37 AM

Phil, how did you come across that auction on ebay?

Phil on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 11:49 AM

it's been floating around the web today and yesterday.

nobody has correctly answered the puzzle I posted this morning btw...

Church on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 11:52 AM

Hmm, Brock inviting people to the woods. That sounds dangerous or the plot of a really crappy horror film

Dween on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 11:58 AM

The only card you would turn over is the "A" card.

The rule says nothing about consonants, or odd numbers. And just because there is a "2" on one side of a card, does not infer that the other side MUST have a vowel.

Marc on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 11:59 AM

Turn over A and 7.
Because A is a vowel, need to see what is on the other side, 2 is even, but we don't have to prove there is a vowel on the other side. 7 however needs to be turned over to possibly prove the statement false.

because if there is a vowel on the other side of the 7, then the statement "if there is a vowel on one side of the card, there is an even number on the other side" would be false

Phil on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 12:01 PM

ding, ding, ding. marc is the winner.

Bigworm on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 12:19 PM

I still think you need to prove both cases with the A and the 2. My reasoning is because what if for some error the 2 didn't have a vowel on the back of it. That would make that statement invalid and probably collapse the universe, thus disrupting our fun times on this website.

I still think there is a valid point to be made that you don't need to turn over the "F" or the "7" simply because no statement was made about those 2 cards. The opposite side of the "F" and the "7" could contain a vowel or an even number, which would still not disprove the statement. Now if there was a statement that said that all the cards are either vowels and even or cons. and odd then you could turn the A or the F or either the 2 and the 7 and support the statement.

Mindy on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 12:19 PM

I would say turn over card A.

Not 2, because it only says "If" Not "if and only if."

So just because there is an even number, doesn't mean you will find a vowel, and actually doesn't even apply.

Phil on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 12:23 PM

'if there is a vowel on one side of the card, there is an even number on the other side'

it doesn't matter if you turn over a B and find a 2. The statement is still true. You must turn over the 7 because there very well could be an E behind that 7. Which would make that a false statement.

Mindy on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 12:26 PM

what if you turn over A and find a 9?

Bigworm on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 12:28 PM

then it is a false statement.

Bigworm on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 12:31 PM

Ah, I am retarded today once again.

Brock on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 12:33 PM

What if you turn over the 7 and find a bloody finger?

Phil on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 12:34 PM

The book says that this puzzle is called the "Wason selection task." It said that in studies using this type of puzzle, the seccess rate has ranged from 20 percent all the way down to 0.

They say that because you can't see the letter behind 7, but you just don't think about it. It's called a disjunction. Out of sight is often out of mind.

Dween on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 12:43 PM

Actually, you'll have to turn over ALL of the cards.
What if you turn over the "F" and find an "I"? That disproves the rule.
Nothing says that each side of a card must contain exactly one letter and one number.

Dween on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 12:44 PM

Stupid Arial font. The above says:

What if you turn over the "F" and find and "I"? (That's a capital i, folks, not a one.)

Bigworm on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 2:28 PM

You don't nec. have to prove the statement true...you just have to determine which cards to flip in order to make it a true or false statement.

Marc on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 3:13 PM

VIDEOS OF THE DAY
http://tinyurl.com/2u5lb

NOTE: If you want to share these videos with your close friends please feel free to do so. even download them to your computer if you wish. just please don't post to larger well-established sites that might cause too much traffic (ie: fark, ebaumsworld, milkandcookies) because I don't want to take the chance of anything bad happening. Also there can be possible copyright issues even though these are broadcasted free on the airwaves. thanks

(1) Hooters gets it's claws into the airline industry. In case of a water-landing, your stewardess may be used as a floatation device

(2) Compilation - Bobcat takes over home, elephant feeds kids, low-rise jeans may cause you to get a fine

(3) Oddball: weed store burns down, guiness's biggest sandwich, couple gets kicked out of buffet for eating too much, and much more.

(4) Compilation - stupid dog-walkers, and crazy car decorators. My favorites are the student driver one( especially because they're also driving shitty on purpose) and the rat that poops potatoes.

(5) More Oddball: incredible police spinouts, EBAY wedding-dress guy, and 4 yr old girl falls from balcony saved by landing on stray dog.

Enjoy.

KellyHarrison on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 3:37 PM

i know she is not mexican, but she's some sort of hispanic origin. i just didn't feel like taking the time to write all the shit in there. can you all do some more unscramble mind boggle words? let people guess before you put the right word on there. just wondering.

stew on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 3:40 PM

Has anybody ever gone drunken mini-putting at Frankfort Ave. Beer Depot? I am strongly considering
going there this evening cuz it's so nice out. If anyone else wants to go, please call me. If not I'm going
to Joe's in lyndon to watch hockey. Plus they have Old Style on tap!! Mmmmm.
Oh, i found a cool/retarded website...maybe you've all seen it already. And because i myself
am retarded i can't post the link but the url is www.subservientchicken.com. If you have large amounts
of downtime at work like myself, it is somewhat entertaining.

stew on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 3:41 PM

Has anybody ever gone drunken mini-putting at Frankfort Ave. Beer Depot? I am strongly considering
going there this evening cuz it's so nice out. If anyone else wants to go, please call me. If not I'm going
to Joe's in lyndon to watch hockey. Plus they have Old Style on tap!! Mmmmm.
Oh, i found a cool/retarded website...maybe you've all seen it already. And because i myself
am retarded i can't post the link but the url is www.subservientchicken.com. If you have large amounts
of downtime at work like myself, it is somewhat entertaining.

stew on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 3:41 PM

Has anybody ever gone drunken mini-putting at Frankfort Ave. Beer Depot? I am strongly considering
going there this evening cuz it's so nice out. If anyone else wants to go, please call me. If not I'm going
to Joe's in lyndon to watch hockey. Plus they have Old Style on tap!! Mmmmm.
Oh, i found a cool/retarded website...maybe you've all seen it already. And because i myself
am retarded i can't post the link but the url is www.subservientchicken.com. If you have large amounts
of downtime at work like myself, it is somewhat entertaining.

stew on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 3:41 PM

Has anybody ever gone drunken mini-putting at Frankfort Ave. Beer Depot? I am strongly considering
going there this evening cuz it's so nice out. If anyone else wants to go, please call me. If not I'm going
to Joe's in lyndon to watch hockey. Plus they have Old Style on tap!! Mmmmm.
Oh, i found a cool/retarded website...maybe you've all seen it already. And because i myself
am retarded i can't post the link but the url is www.subservientchicken.com. If you have large amounts
of downtime at work like myself, it is somewhat entertaining.

stew on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 3:42 PM

Has anybody ever gone drunken mini-putting at Frankfort Ave. Beer Depot? I am strongly considering
going there this evening cuz it's so nice out. If anyone else wants to go, please call me. If not I'm going
to Joe's in lyndon to watch hockey. Plus they have Old Style on tap!! Mmmmm.
Oh, i found a cool/retarded website...maybe you've all seen it already. And because i myself
am retarded i can't post the link but the url is www.subservientchicken.com. If you have large amounts
of downtime at work like myself, it is somewhat entertaining.

KellyHarrison on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 3:44 PM

stew, been there sober and played mini golf. it's alright.

Jay on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 3:51 PM

I like Latino chicks like Zhang ZiYi, China Chow, and Kelly Hu.

Jay on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 3:56 PM

I also like Asian chicks like Eva Mendes, Jennifer Lopez, and Marie Constance.

KellyHarrison on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 4:35 PM

since we're on the subject of hispanic people, i love The Rock. he's so fuckin' hot! i'm not sure what his hispanic origin is, but i know for sure he's not white at least.

Church on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 5:38 PM

The Rock is Polynesian and African AMerican. If Lucy Liu has hispanic roots than I never have insulted Brock. Hispanic- referencing those from Latin America.
Asian- referencing those from Asian descent
There is a big fucking difference

Mindy on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 5:39 PM

uhh..
Right. I forgot that Spain claimed Hawaii.
And China....

mowgli on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 6:20 PM

don't feel bad kelly...I'm Korean, and I like tacos, muy bueno...

air dry that shit...

KellyHarrison on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 6:23 PM

i love mexican and seafood and barely get any of them because of marc's damn pickiness. so i eat it when i'm on breaks at school or when out with friends who do like it. marc you assclown, it's good stuff. why do you have to be so picky? (smiles)

Jay on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 7:02 PM

Kellie-Here's a thought. Quit posting if you don't know what you're talking about. Like the fact that Asia and Latin america are TWO FUCKING DIFFERENT CONTINENTS. And as church pointed out, Dwayne Johnson is half black and half polynesian. Why don't you learn some geography and ethnic history before commenting on either. I mean, God Damn!!!

KellyHarrison on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 7:34 PM

i never said anyone was asia or latin for sure. i just said i knew they were of some origin that i didn't know what they were. good lord people!
oh, and i hate geography!
anyone up for a movie later on saturday during the evening?
are we doing any betting on horses? by betting i mean like drawing names out of the hat or putting a dollar or so in on who you think is going to win and who ever win's gets all the money or what ever the winning item is.

Bigworm on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 7:45 PM

Ellykay - It's okay for Marc to be picky when it comes to food. The only seafood that is good is Shrimp, everything else sucks in my opinion, so I will have to stay with Marc on that.

Philco - are you going to be in town for Derby?

Also, if people are planning on coming over will you please either post something on here or email me or something.

Bigworm on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 7:45 PM

Or just tell me I suppose.

KellyHarrison on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 7:59 PM

i know that marc and i will be there. i mentioned it to adrian at o'charleys, but can abby make those margaritas again? never got one before. can we order pizza magia? unless we're already having something specific? do you want anyone to bring drinks or snacks?

Bigworm on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 8:12 PM

If people plan on drinking just bring some beer or alcohol to share with people, we are providing food....though I doubt Pizza Magia is in the works. Abby and I were thinking more along the lines of finger foods.

Jay on Wednesday, April 28, 2004 at 10:46 PM

I can bring some spanish food like General Tso's chicken, Beef Teryaki, or some Mu Gu Gai Pan. Maybe some asian liquor like Jose Cuervo Especial.

Dween on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 4:22 AM

On the site www.kentuckyderby.com you can sign up to win $5,000,000. All you have to do is name the order, 1 through 20, that the Derby horses will place.

The odds of doing so are over 1 in 20 quintillion.

The odds are better that you would win the Powerball Jackpot twice in a row.

If everyone in the world were allowed to enter the contest as many times as they'd like, everyone would have to enter over 350,000,000 times to ensure just one person would win.

Food for thought.

Phil on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 4:46 AM

you know who I think is hot? Eskimos - like Dr. Ahmad's daughter.

adrian on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 5:02 AM

Lauren Bush was on TV the other day and all I can say is "Jackpot Baby"

Phil on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 5:05 AM

I almost missed big marc's movie post. excellent stuff there, marc!

adrian on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 5:55 AM

If anyone wants to go in halves on a case of Smirnoff Ice, just let me know. Also I say we break out the hard stuff...Some O'Douls. I am ready to get hammered

Church on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 5:59 AM

Adrian's all about the Smirnoff

adrian on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 6:10 AM

Hey Church, you Flaming Ass Jockey, your going to the Oaks right?

Church on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 6:12 AM

Yes you bastardized horse raper. I am in the grandstand, wanna bet on how much money I lose.

KellyHarrison on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 6:55 AM

i'll bring some homeade sweet and sour chicken if anyone likes that. i can actually make it without burning it!

Dween on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 7:00 AM

Why do some guys feel the need to listen to their voice mail on their cell phones while taking a leak at the urinal? I mean, come on. Take 60 seconds, hold your wang, and let the messages wait a minute.

/rant

adrian on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 7:04 AM

Why do bastards from New Horizons come up to the Second Floor to take a fucking shit? Use your floors bathroom you assholes.

Phil on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 7:13 AM

why would anyone use anything besides the third floor bathroom? it's like your own private bathroom up there.

sweet and sour chicken? no thanks, i don't like brazilian food.

Bigworm on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 7:21 AM

I am looking for some good fish. Does anyone know where I can get the best breaded filet mignon in Louisville?

Phil on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 7:23 AM

filet mignon = the ultimate sea cow.

you can buy sea cow at most native america restaruants. I'd try the Maharaja Indian Restaurant

adrian on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 7:23 AM

I heard Ruth's Chris has the best Cod graded angus beef

Phil on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 7:27 AM

I know why it's called Ruth's Chris. I heard Chris gave Ruth some good colonel angus.

Plow King on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 7:33 AM

RE: the card question

The "Wason selection task?" WTF? Anybody who has taken a basic logic class knows the way you negate the assertion "If there is a vowel on one side of the card, there is an even number on the other side" is by saying, "If there is an odd number on one side of the card, there is a vowel on the other side." THAT is why you need to turn over the A and the 7. I don't see why Wasson felt this was a selection or a task.

And that reminds me: Phil, you bastard, you never gave me my logic book back. Best damn textbook I ever had.

Phil on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 7:38 AM

it's not that the question is hard, it'd that even when aware of the logic the vast majority of people don't think to check the 7 because they can't see the letter behind it.

Plow King on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 7:49 AM

You turn over the A to test the original assertion. If true, turn over the 7 to test it's negative. I don't follow what the inability to see the letter behind the 7 has to do with it. But then again I guess that's why I got the question right.

Phil on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 7:52 AM

exactly. i think most people actually think they've gotten the trick with the 2, and their mind just goes right past the 7 because of the whole out of sight, out of mind thing.

the book says that in the studies that even when told about the proper logic, people would still get the question wrong.

Bigworm on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 8:12 AM

Well GOD-FUCKING-DAMN, I'VE SEEN THE LIGHT. thanks PLOW KING for such a great explanation. Yeah my mind was way out there somewhere, so of course, I missed it.

Well Plow King, if people have the inability to see the possibility of the letter behind the 7, then they might give the statement the false correct answer. If they don't turn the 7 over, they are still wrong. Even though you got the question right, what is so hard to understand that some people might not think to turn the 7 over?

Dween on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 8:33 AM

Why wouldn't you turn over the "F" card? What if the "F" has an "A" behind it? That would also falsify the statement. Nothing says that all cards have one letter and one number on it.

And we take dumps on the second floor because it's too long a walk to floor 3, and that elevator scares me.

Adrian: Say hi to Brent for me.

Bigworm on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 8:44 AM

Philco, where are the questions for the day at?

Phil on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 8:52 AM

hmmmm:

five pirates have 100 gold coins. they have to divide up the loot. in order of seniority (suppose pirate 5 is most senior, pirate 1 is least senior), the most senior pirate proposes a distribution of the loot. they vote and if at least 50% accept the proposal, the loot is divided as proposed. otherwise the most senior pirate is executed, and they start over again with the next senior pirate. what solution does the most senior pirate propose? assume they are very intelligent and extremely greedy (and that they would prefer not to die). they also aren't going to cap anyone unless the vote says so.

Plow King on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 8:53 AM

I apologize if I sounded elitist. I am anything but.

It's just that when people come to an illogical conclusion, I try to follow their train of thought to see where they went wrong. I can understand that people wouldn't think to turn the 7 over. I never meant to imply that. If people don't fully understand the logic, then they wouldn't know to turn it over.

I just don't understand how not seeing a letter on the other side of the 7 would come in to play. All of the people who understand the logic will choose the 7. Some of those that do not understand it, will not choose the 7 because they cannot see the letter on the other side of it. I'm trying to understand why.

Phil on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 9:08 AM

it's not a logic question, per se. in fact, the same question put into different contexts is shown to do much better. for example, this problem (which logically is the same) has been shown that 80% of people answer correctly, as compared to the 0 to 20% that get the other one wrong:

Teenagers who don’t have their own cars usually end up borrowing their parents’ cars. In return for the privilege of borrowing the car, the Goldstein’s have givein their kids the rule, "If you borrow my car, then you have to fill up the tank with gas."

Of course, teenagers are sometimes careless and irresponsible. You are interested in seeing whether any of the Goldstein teenagers broke this rule.

These cares represent four of the Goldstein teenagers. Each card represents one teenager. One side of the card tells whether or not a teenager has borrowed the parents’ car on a particular day, and the other side tells whether or not that teenager filled up the tank with gas on that day.

Which of the following cards would you definitely need to turn over to see if any of these teenagers are breaking their parents’ rule:

"If you borrow my car, then you have to fill up the tank with gas."

Don’t turn over any more cards than are absolutely necessary.

-borrowed car
-did not borrow car
-filled up tank with gas
-did not fill up tank with gas

Bigworm on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 9:10 AM

I think that the senior pirate would divide out the coins so that you have only 1 gold coin separating each pirate. That way the more senior pirates get more coins than the lesser pirates. Here is the distribution I propose:
#5 22 coins, #4 - 21 coins, #3 - 20 coins, #2 -19 coins, and #1 - 18 coins, total = 100 coins.

I further think this will pass because if you you divide the 100 coins evenly that means everyone gets 20. So 5 and 4 get more than that so they are happy, and #3 gets exaclty 20 so he isn't losing anything, once again happy. This should pass with atleast a 60% vote, thus not causing any executions.

Phil on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 9:12 AM

Pirates 1-4 vote the senior pirate down knowing that he'll die, and then they get to divide 100 coins by four people, instead of 5...

Marc on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 9:14 AM

What if pirate 5 porposed to distribute equally amonst himself and pirate 4 nad 3. give nothing to 1 or 2. then 3 of the greedy pirates would each get a large chunk. and 1 and 2 can't say shit because they are outnumbered in the vote. if if they were so willing to kill the guy who proposes a bad distribution m,ethond, then they could kill the little bitches that disagree with this one. or they could keep their damn mouths shut and stay alive. case closed. actually, there most likely is another answer (a correct one) but this works for me.

Phil on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 9:18 AM

it's not in pirates #4 and #3's interest to keep #5 alive in your case marc. if just one of them wants to take #5 out to get more money (and they will, they are of course pirates), pirate #5 is doomed. once #5 is out of the way, #4 and #3 can just agree to spilt the money 50/50. unless #3 sites with #1 and #2 to take out #4 of course...

Phil on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 9:18 AM

either way, #5 is dead. it doesn't really matter what happens to the money as long as #5 is dead. we'll assume we are the dread pirate #5, so we don't want to die.

Marc on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 9:36 AM

How about this:
What if pirate 5 tooks only 12 coins to get by temporarily (you know for you're basic rum, food , and whores) but claims exclusively rights to the boat, as well as licensing of any music, stories, merchandise, that come from their adventures. That shit can add up. Look at Pirates of the Caribbean.

Example One: George Lucas took rights to merchandise and licensing of Star Wars when the studio couldn't pay him, and since they thought it was a gamble. He made bank, and now has his own studios and production companies.

Example Two: Likewise: not knowing if Animal House was to be a hit. they offered Donald Sutherland (the film's then only known star) $50,000 or $10,000 and a share of the profits of the film (mind you this was for two days of filming). he took the quick money and lost out on $17 million. That woulda been a nice income for two measely days.

Bigworm on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 9:37 AM

Well the situation I proposed was to try to keep everybody happy, and honestly I thought they would go for it because the other 2 pirates are only giving up 1 and 2 coins each. So then if this is the game, why not just divide up 99 coins evenly for pirates 5,4,and 3 and let 1 and 2 share 1. That way the top 3 are equal and no one dies....

And if you just keep offing the leader and they realize that this process is working, then why would the pirates continue until 1 and 2 have 50 coins apiece.

Bigworm on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 9:41 AM

And going back to my first post...if this pirates are as intelligent as I give them credit for, shouldn't they realize that if they decide to kill one pirate , i.e. the one with most seniority, then that trend will continue until only 2 remain to split the jackpot.

Plow King on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 9:42 AM

In a situation of 2 pirates, 2 would take 100 and screw 1. He's guaranteed 50% of the vote. 1 would definitely be looking to avoid that situation.

Bigworm on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 9:42 AM

unless 3 and 4 form a pact, but since they are pirates...could they really trust each other.

Bigworm on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 9:45 AM

Well good call there PK, so then I guess #5 will get offed and 4 will offer a 50/50 with 3 and he will take that offer, and screw 1 and 2 because they realize that they cannot do any better than 1/2 the loot and maintain atleast 50% of the vote.

Bigworm on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 9:46 AM

It is not in the best interest for #3 not to take that deal, because if not then he already knows his fate, and #2 claims all the loot.

Dween on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 9:46 AM

PIRATE QUESTION:
From most senior to least senior, the split is:
97-0-1-1-1

Working backwards:
If just 2 pirates are left, The split would be:

X-X-X-100-0 (X represents a dead senior pirate)
Since a 50% majority is needed for a split, 1 vote wins.
So, to avoid this, say 3 pirates are alive:

X-X-99-0-1
The last pirate is happy to get more than his previous share of 0, so he votes for it. So does the 99 pirate.
To avoid this, say 4 pirates are alive:

X-99-0-0-1
The last pirate will always vote yes. The 99 pirate will vote yes. Screw the middle 2. But now, all 5 are alive:

97-0-1-0-2
Lets number the pirates: 1-2-3-4-5
Pirate 5 will vote yes, because at this point, this is the best offer he can get.
Pirate 1 will vote yes, since he gets 97 coins.
Pirate 3 will vote yes, because if it goes to the next round, he's screwed back to 0.

Marc on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 9:49 AM

what if 5 said "cuck 3 and 4, fuck them up their stupid asses. and split it with 1 and 2(34,33,33). because besides from the scenario of 1 and 2 holding out and killing everyone until they are assured 50 each( unless one kills the other) then this would be the most they could possibly get. and hopefully would get their vote, and majority rules.

Bigworm on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 10:21 AM

Pirate Gold:

5-97
4-0
3-0
2-2
1-1

Pirate five will take the most because he doesn't have to give up anymore.

Pirates 2 and 1 will vote yes because they are atleast getting a piece of the pie and since they realize if they vote no, then they get nothing. At this point this is their best offer that they can get because if they vote no then pirate 4 and 3 split the loot 50/50.

Phil on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 10:46 AM

james is very close. but the last pirate will not always vote yes. in the four pirate situation, you are better off pirate #2 a coin, and screwing #1. Pirate #1 knows that in a three pirate setup, he'll get one coin no matter what. So he'll vote #4 off to die, because fuck him for being greedy.

Phil on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 10:47 AM

oh and to finish my thought, #2 knows that in a three pirate situation, he's going to he screwed, so he'll vote yes for one shiny coin in the four pirate situation.

Phil on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 10:54 AM

hmmmm, so

one pirate: pirate wins 1-0, keeps all 100
two pirate: senior pirate wins 1-1, keeps all 100 (one is not happy)
three pirates: pirate #3 knows he's screwed if they vote against him, so he buys one of them off. knowing that pirate #1 knows that if it gets to two pirates he'll get zero, he throws him one coin
four pirates: pirate #4 knows he needs to buy one person off. he could either give pirate #1 two coins, or take advantage of pirate #2's logic abilities. Pirate #2 knows that if it gets to three pirates, he'll get nothing. So giving #2 a coin is better than giving #1 two coins.

as for five pirates...

Jay on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 10:58 AM

Are they ass pirates?

Phil on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 11:02 AM

yes jay, they are ass pirates.

Jay on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 11:12 AM

Just checking. Dude, Shireen wasn't Inuit, she was Italian. I know they both begin with I, but come on, phil.

Dween on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 11:14 AM

I'm happy with just being close.

Here's one:
DO NOT PARTIALLY ANSWER THIS.
Either give all 4 or none at all.
And don't look it up.
Name the four words in the English language that
end in -DOUS.
Don't worry, this is not a trick question like -GRY.

Phil on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 11:14 AM

Italian, eh? That explains why I saw her in Steak and Shake.

Phil on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 11:18 AM

i know the word thing.

stupendous
hazardous
tremendous
and horrendous

Marc on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 11:25 AM

are we still answering the pirate question? if so:
98-0-0-1-1
that way 5(that greedy fuck) gets as much as possible while ensuring the vote. because fuck 3 and 4. they don't matter. but 1 and 2, being two smart motherfuckers realize that if they take out 5, then 3 and 4 will go halves on the loot and have a needed 50% vote. so, getting one coin is the best either 1 or 2 can even do.
so here we go:
Pirate 5=98 coins (gredy fuck)
Pirate 4=0 (fuck him)
Pirate 3=0 (fuck him)
Pirate 2=1 (this bitch gets one)
Pirate 1=1 (this lucky bitch also gets just one coin.)

Phil on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 11:36 AM

actually in a four person pirate situation, it would be pirates #4 and #2 getting all the loot.

pirate #4 could buy off #2 with a coin, and screw #3 all together. pirate #2 could easily say let #5 die, because he's a pirate, and will make the same amount of money. you are looking at a 50/50 shot that pirate 2 kills you. not great odds.

Brock on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 11:46 AM

Well, since they are ass pirates, pirate 5 could just let each of them give him one in the ass, and keep the loot. Being ass pirates, they like it in the ass, and being pirates, he likes loot, so whats to lose?

Marc on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 11:58 AM

well, point taken. here's a thought. 1 could conitinue to vote no until 3 in the senior pirate because he knows 3 will have to make a deal with him to stay alive. that's thinking 1 is really fucking greedy. in which case 3 would need him to vote yes , just so 3 could stay alive. so he could get higher than 1 coin then. but on the other hand if he kills 3 he gets nothing because 2 will take it all. so how much can he really get. he'd be screwed too. by either trying to get more than one, or nothing at all. since a bird in the hand is worth more, let go with that thought. so now 5 has to just ensure 3 and 1.

98-0-1-0-1

Marc on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 12:21 PM

my mind is turning to mush. now that i think further, (scary thought, i know) I can't think of anything better than dween's answer.

Marc on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 12:35 PM

so it's not 97-0-1-0-2? it looks like dween did include two answer as his in the post. but that one makes sense to me. 1(lowest guy) can't get more 1 from any of the greedy bastards, so one extra coin. should sway him towards your plan. already established 3 is fucked in next round. so one coin is better than nothing for him. it would be safe to give some to 2 as well, but we aren't talking nice people we're talking about crazy greedy pirates. who want to take as much as possible without dying. and since in this riddle we considered them gredy above, just watching a another pirate die just for the fun of it. then he needs some mere incentive to vote yes, instead of letting the next guy give him only 1 again.
so, i think like 97-0-1-02 i'll try not to post anymore about this one, as i am going nuts. so someone please some this one so we can move on.

Phil on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 12:48 PM

the answer is 98-0-1-0-1.

no reason to give pirate #1 better than 0. If it makes it to four, he'd be fucked altogether by 4 and 2, so one coin is better than 0.

Marc on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 12:54 PM

True phil, but think of it this way. 1 might not get anymore than one coin from anyone. but he might have no loyalties and say "fuck no" and kill all of them, because someone will always offer him at least one to win the vote. and so you might always have a 50/50 shot of 1 voting no just to kill you for not making it easy and giving him one more coin, right? or would 4 is the next vote be able to bypass 1 and give 2 one coin?

Phil on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 12:57 PM

pirate #1 will only get paid by pirate #5 or pirate #3.

#4 takes into account the knowledge that #2 would be screwed in a three pirate situation, and bribes him one dollar to keep it from getting there (you could also bribe #1, but #1 wouldn't care about the outcome knowing that he's getting one coin no matter what). Pirate #1 is of no consequence to pirate #4.

Marc on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 1:02 PM

ok, now we're done with this one. and this post is extremely close to being the one with the most comments. and only since monday. impressive

Mindy on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 1:02 PM

Who is PLOW KING?

Phil on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 1:03 PM

impressive indeed. now we need more riddles! and no more language riddles! they are, as the french say, the sux0r.

Dween on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 1:11 PM

Are you going to start a new thread? Or shall we just keep filling this one up?

RIDDLE 1:
It falls, but never breaks, it's partner breaks, but never falls.

RIDDLE 2:
The wetter I get the drier you get.

RIDDLE 3:
What can go up a chimney down, but not down a chimney up?

Some of these are a little simple and/or old, but it's something to get you started.

Mindy on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 1:13 PM

Is#1 night/day?

Marc on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 1:28 PM

#2 is a towel( or sponge)

hoban on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 3:36 PM

Finalyl I can answer one before anyone else does....#3 is an umbrella

Mindy on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 8:00 PM

What if #3 is baby bird feathers? (down)

no? hmm. ok.

Plow King on Thursday, April 29, 2004 at 8:17 PM

For those who don't know me, here's a picture of me in my Halloween costume from last year:

http://www.somethingawful.com/cliff.../page-259/4.jpg

hoban on Friday, April 30, 2004 at 5:36 AM

Nope tis an umbrella...Umbrella can go up chimneys (like in Mary Poppins but can not go down a chimney while up...Birds can go down and up chimneys plus how can a bird feather be "up" while going down a chimney?

joe on Friday, April 30, 2004 at 5:53 AM

wes, get out of my recliner you jackass

adrian on Friday, April 30, 2004 at 6:07 AM

Is anything going on tonight?

joe on Friday, April 30, 2004 at 6:58 AM

i'll fuck you up bitch

Mindy on Friday, April 30, 2004 at 7:48 AM

Thefact that down cannot be "up" is why it would work:

Because no matter which dierection it goes it is STILL down...

So when the feather goes up the chimney it is down.
When it goes down the chimney, it is still down.

Therefore it works.

Phil on Friday, April 30, 2004 at 8:02 AM

i think the question is simply poorly worded for print.
"What can go up a chimney while down, but not go down a chimney while up?" would be more appopriate.

Mindy on Friday, April 30, 2004 at 8:10 AM

Oh. So now you can call me(out)?

Phil on Friday, April 30, 2004 at 8:11 AM

yes, dear.

Marc on Friday, April 30, 2004 at 8:27 AM

Bullshit! a re-stating of a poorly written riddle is the only thing that makes her wrong. ( I don't blame dween, i thought the statment written that exact way a few different places in a google search) Mindy found an aswer to it, not the intended answer, but her answer fits the original too. so therefore she gets three cookies. one for getting the answer, the second for not getting the intended answer either, and three for calling out about it. but I deduct one cookie for backing down. Sorry Mindy, only two cookies. but excellent job.

Bigworm on Friday, April 30, 2004 at 9:13 AM

Bite me Joe.

Jay on Friday, April 30, 2004 at 12:01 PM

We definitely need to go out tonight.

Brock on Friday, April 30, 2004 at 12:21 PM

I know I am! I finally get to actually celebrate a birthday for once instead of studying for finals.

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